


Lie To Me, Lie With Me

by baeminhyuk



Series: There's Something About You And Me [4]
Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, F/F, F/M, Lisa-centric, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-17 16:00:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15464997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeminhyuk/pseuds/baeminhyuk
Summary: Lisa’s heart is beating too hard and she feels like she's going to throw up. "I love you, Jennie. I'm so in love with you and you should know that."





	Lie To Me, Lie With Me

**Author's Note:**

> i hate that i even wrote this but i couldn't help myself after hearing that lisa's joining real men. it's not military-themed per se but anyway, this is completely AU (jen's an actress, lisa and v are bestfriends) with a bunch of swear words and slightly mature themes, but nothing too bad. hope you enjoy!

 

Taehyung enters the military in 2024 but decides to remain enlisted even after his years of mandatory service. He explains to everyone who wanted to know that he was doing it because his dad did and he wants to be that kind of man, the man who'll do anything for his country and the people he loves. He thinks being in the army will do that, that he needs to do this for himself, too, and it's too late for anyone to talk him out of it.

Lisa gets it, even if she'd never join the army herself. Then again, she doesn't know what the heck she's going to do with her life and her psychology degree, so she kind of envies Taehyung for figuring it out.

Jennie shows up at Lisa's house with her eyes all red and a pissed off look on her face.

"Did you tell him to do this?"

"What? No," Lisa says. She watches Jennie slam the door and her lip trembles.

Jennie narrows her eyes. Then she comes over and sits down on Lisa's bed and puts her face in her hands. She's crying really hard and it's not the first time she's ever done this exact thing in this exact spot.

Taehyung and Lisa are bestfriends. They've been friends way before Jennie and Taehyung got together the second or third time, or whatever it was. They were on a break over Christmas this year when Jennie admitted things were moving too fast for her, and she ended up kissing Lisa once on her bed, then swearing her to secrecy. She and Taehyung were back together by New Year's and practically freaking engaged by Valentine's Day.

She still hangs out with Lisa alone, and Taehyung doesn't have a problem with it. He probably would if he knew about last Christmas, but whatever. Jennie wouldn't cheat on him and he trusts her and knows that, and Lisa wouldn't go there with her and ruin her friendship with Taehyung. She loves Taehyung like a brother (shut up) and she's not going to let it come to that.

That doesn't mean she doesn't _care_ about Jennie more than she should, even if they are close.

"I don't need another reason to worry," she admits. She's already going to be in Beijing for a year to film for this huge drama and Taehyung had been offered a full-time job in Busan and she was freaking out about the distance and confessed that to Lisa a few weeks ago.

"You'll be fine," she tells Jennie, running her hand up and down Jennie's back. To be honest, Lisa doesn't know that shit for sure. She knows she's a prick for  _wanting_ to doubt it. Distance breaks up relationships all the time and she's never been an optimist.

Jennie looks at her, searches her eyes for something, then throws her arms around the younger girl and holds on too tight. "I thought for sure you'd go, too," she almost whispers. "I thought... Lisa, if you join the army with him, I swear I'll never talk to you again."

She laughs, can't help it, and slides her hand up to cradle the back of Jennie's head. "Can't have that," she says. Jennie just shakes her head and doesn't move, and Lisa's sure as hell not gonna ask her to.

 

* * *

 

Lisa gets a letter from Jennie two weeks after she's left for Beijing.

It's kind of stupid, since they have internet access and phones and talk on a pretty regular basis, but her writing them letters on monogrammed paper is just so Jennie that Lisa doesn't have the heart to really think it's all that lame.

Jennie tells her that she's already having this ’conflict' with one of her co-actors and she's not sure she's going to survive the year. She says that China is amazing, though, and it's still hot enough for shorts and sleeveless tops, and that she spent an entire two hours in a used vinyl store Lisa would have loved. She mentions that she saw Chaeyoung, one of their old friends, in town and that she's not homesick, but she misses things like that, just bumping into people she knows.

She signs the letter with her name and a pink heart, then her P.S. says that she doesn't  _really_  do that every time she writes her name, but she thought it'd be cute to do it to Lisa because she was always making fun of her for it.

Lisa doesn't know what to do with it. She puts it on her bedside table and it stays there for a couple hours until she stuffs it between the pages of a book Jennie bought her and told her she had to read it. This is the first time she's opened it. Seems appropriate.

 

* * *

 

Lisa takes this new head HR job at YG Entertainment, and she feels like a freaking failure already. She's got nothing against people who take an office job until they die, don't get her wrong, but she doesn't want to be one of them.

"So don't be," Jennie tells her when she says that to her. Lisa scoffs. "Promise me."

"Promise you what?"

"Promise me you won't do this for your whole life," she says. "You can't break promises to me."

Lisa doesn't know if that means she's not  _allowed_  or if Jennie just knows she physically  _can't_. It doesn't really matter, but she'd like to know.

"Fine. I promise."

"Say it like you mean it," Jennie giggles.

 

* * *

 

Lisa knows she sees Jennie second on holiday break, that Taehyung gets her first. That's how it _should_ be, but Jennie doesn't care and it still bugs her. Jennie sees her in a parking lot at Hongdae and runs up to her, screams her name and practically jumps on her, locks her legs around the taller woman's waist. She kisses Jennie's cheek right there amidst the cold breeze and doesn't care who sees.

Jennie holds her hand and sits beside her the whole time, and they go out for dinner after, just the two of them, and when Lisa's foot bumps Jennie's under the table, the latter doesn't move hers, just presses it closer and tells Lisa about Beijing and how much she misses everyone.

"Even me?"

The petite Korean girl smiles and shakes her head a little like Lisa's stupid for asking. "Especially you," she says, laughing a little when she looks down at the table.

 

* * *

 

Taehyung gets sent to Gangwon-do. It's not a combat mission or anything, obviously, but there's a base there and some work to do, and Taehyung is called up to go. He gets two days to go home and say goodbye to family, and Lisa's pretty sure he spends at least half of that on the phone with Jennie.

Jennie calls the house late at night and Lisa runs for the phone so it doesn't wake anyone up.

"I'm still scared," she admits after Lisa's said hello.

"I know."

"I hate him for doing this to me," she confesses like a secret.

Lisa doesn't know what to say to that, so she just says, "I know," again and doesn't try to comfort her all that much.

 

* * *

 

She almost doesn't recognize Jennie. She hasn't seen the actress since the holidays. They still talk all the time, but seeing her...

She doesn't know how Jennie does it, but she gets more _fucking_ beautiful with every birthday, she'd swear.

Jennie's home for the summer and they made plans to meet for coffee, but it still surprises the hell out of Lisa to see her walking down the sidewalk towards her in this purple summer dress with a smile on her face so wide it makes her own insides twist.

"Li,” she breathes out when she gets up to hug her. "You look so good."

She scoffs. She looks the same. "You grew out your hair. You look beautiful."

Jennie pulls back, laughs and combs her fingers through it. "Yeah. More like I'm too much of a cheapskate to spend money on a cut in some fancy Chinese salon."

She holds Jennie by the hips at arms' length and looks at her. "I like it."

Jennie smiles and goes to order herself a sweet tea.

 

* * *

 

She spends enough days with Jennie in those dresses or bathing suits or shorts that almost show too much of her legs that Lisa sometimes can’t help but think of her wearing nothing even more than she used to. She slaps herself across the face when she thinks about it. They go out with friends one night and she picks her up and Jennie asks her to zip her dress for her. She asks if she'll let her unzip it at the end of the night, and Jennie laughs like she's joking and swats her on the arm. She has _no_ damn clue.

Lisa realizes it one afternoon when they're in her room writing some songs for fun like old times — Jennie works on the lyrics and she plucks out the melody and works out the chords. Jennie asks her what she thinks of a line and Lisa says, "I don't know. Sing it," and she watches Jennie's face as she does.

She doesn't know when she started being in love with Jennie, but it's a bitch knowing she can't just _tell_ her.

 

* * *

 

In June, Jennie comes to her crying and says she's breaking up with Taehyung because she _can't_ be with someone she sees only once a year. She should tell her to think it through — any idiot can see that she's in love with the guy no matter where he is or what he's doing — but she doesn't. Lisa just lets her lay on her bed while she plays her on her guitar all the saddest songs she knows.

 

* * *

 

Taehyung calls her and asks how Jennie's doing. Lisa says, "Fine," because it's mostly the truth. She doesn't mean for it to hurt the guy, but she knows it does anyway. "How are you?" she asks for good measure.

"How have I always been without her?" Taehyung asks. It sounds like a joke, but it's not. "Miserable. I hate this."

And it sounds pretty fucking familiar, actually, because she's never had Jennie herself, not really, and she probably never will.

"Yeah," she says, then changes the subject because she can't for her life deal with hearing Taehyung pine over her.

It's just that she'll never get to publicly say that she wants Jennie while Taehyung's been doing it since they were freaking 18.

 

* * *

 

She knows when they start drinking that something's going to happen, and she's not a good enough person to stop it before it starts. She spends most of her free time with Jennie when she's not working, and Jennie was so damn proud of her when she told her she got offered a job as an army psychologist in Icheon that she could have kissed her right there in her living room with other people watching.

"Why are all of you in uniforms?" Jennie asks. Yeah, she's _definitely_ drunk. She can tell by the way Jennie's got her arm around her waist as she sits on the stage in her basement. "Taehyung, you.."

She laughs. That's hardly  _all_  of them, but whatever. "Don't know."

"You're going to look so good in a uniform." Jennie runs her hand across her back right above her jeans. "So good."

"Jennie, please don't start this unless you're gonna finish it," she warns her. Jennie gives her this look that she swears struck a fire inside of her. The smaller girl bites her bottom lip and Lisa remembers her biting  _her_ bottom lip. Then Jennie pushes the tips of her fingers up under her sleeve at the back of her arm.

"I want to finish it," Jennie confesses. She doesn't know why she's talking so quiet, because they were the only ones left there. "With you. I want _you_."

She takes Jennie up to her room and presses her back against the door, slips her hand into her and kisses her until Jennie pushes her away because she can't breathe. Jennie practically begs her, pushes the taller girl’s head down her body until Lisa puts her mouth on her and screams Lisa’s name.

Jennie falls asleep soon after and Lisa should leave, but she _doesn't_.

She wakes up alone in Jen’s bed and hears Jennie talking to someone on the phone in the kitchen. She says some bullshit about them just getting carried away and Lisa slams the door so hard on the way out, she hopes Jennie  _felt_  it.

 

* * *

 

Jennie and Taehyung are back together by September and it doesn't surprise her in the slightest.

When everyone is home over the holidays, Jennie and Taehyung are inseparable and Lisa starts sleeping around to get over her. Jennie finds out and looks at her all disappointed, which she thinks is crap.

"What's it to you? I'm old enough to know what I'm doing."

"Lalisa," she whispers. "You're better than that."

And Lisa's a little stupid, so she steps closer and looks down on Jennie. "Not good enough for _you_ , though, right?"

Jennie looks away from her and she's glad they're alone when she puts her hand on Jennie's cheek and turns her face back towards hers. "Don't," the porcelain-skin girl says.

"Would you just fucking listen to me for two seconds?" Jennie takes a short little breath and meets her eyes. Jen’s practically begging her not to say something.

"I'm sorry I said we were a mistake." Because of course Jennie can't just let her talk for once. "I just..."

"Shut up," she says. "Can you just stop talking?"

Jennie closes her eyes and nods. It's like she knows what Lisa's going to say and she doesn't really want her to, but she's going to let her because she knows Lisa  _needs_  to.

"Okay."

"I know you love Taehyung and it's always going to be Taehyung," she says. Lisa’s heart is beating too hard and she feels like she's going to throw up. "But I love you, Jennie. I'm so in love with you and you should know that."

Jennie's got her shirt in her fists and Lisa doesn't know when she did that. Not important.

"I do," Jennie almost whispers.

The door opens behind them and they take steps back from each another, even though no one comes in and no one saw them just standing so close together. Jennie wipes her eyes and Lisa needs to get the hell out of this house right now.

"Okay," she says. She puts her hand on Jennie's waist, kisses her forehead and walks past her.

Lisa's not going to play that game where she'd wonder if things could have been different if they'd met earlier or she had her first or Taehyung never stepped up or any of that trash. Things are what they are and they're like that for a reason. Lisa was _never_ going to have her.

Jennie knows that she loves her but she _still_ wants someone else. It doesn't get a whole lot clearer than that.

 

**Author's Note:**

> title is from ['i hate u, i love u'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7vRriwrloYVaoAe3a9wJHe?si=Xb67nmD-TFywLfqBxB0Gfg) by gnash
> 
> again, i can't believe that i even wrote this but i hope that you guys liked it nonetheless. just wanted to come up with some angst. please send me a kudos and a comment, reading your comments makes my day :) thanks again!
> 
> p.s. i'm on twitter, @baeminhyuk! chat me up there :)


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